The Loft (Sara) [Mature]

[Matrim Gallagher]

Something people didn't know about Matrim was he was the descendant of a fairly good line of rock stars. Not just rock stars of course, but rock stars who themselves come from money. So being the last remaining heir after the rest of his family had kicked the bucket, Matrim himself nearly joining that list on several occasions, he had money. Lots of it, but the thing was he wasn't used to spending it on a place to live, that is until he came to San Francisco.

He had wanted a nice place to live with Reira, but that wasn't the picture anymore. He was in a loft, in a higher up floor of a building in downtown San Francisco. So he drove Sara on his motorcycle to the garage of his building, and then walked her towards the elevator that would take them up to one of the higher floors. It wasn't the top or anything, but it was fairly high up.

All the while Matrim would have his arm around her, and as the Elevator opened up to his floor he stepped out of it, and unlocked the door, to his Loft. It was the only door on this floor, the rest of the floor had yet to be converted into living space. But, Matrim's area was, and he loved his loft.

Opening the door he took a few steps back, hitting a light switch which turned on some of the lights on the side walls, as well as some lights around the stairs, but there wasn't an awful lot of lighting during the night time in his loft. It was mostly lit by daylight during the day, and he liked it to be somewhat darker at night time.

"Well... this is it," He said, "Did you want a drink? I got some Jack Daniels, some Patron, basically just pick your poison...."

(OOC: Matrim's Loft)

[Sara Quinn]

Sara's heart was hammering out of her chest. It had started off as fear as he drove her on the motorcycle to his home. In some part of her mind, she knew he shouldn't have been driving, but she had let him, and then had clung to him like a child as they rode. Then it was shock as she had looked at the building he lived in. Not quite what she had expected... Then it was nerves as he walked her to the door, and they took the elevator to one of the higher floors, arm around her. His arm around her made her feel... Warm. Her whole body felt very hot being that close to him, and it was like her body was charged with electricity as the knowledge of what they had done, and what might happen again.

As they entered his loft, she pulled away from his side, taking a few more steps into the apartment. She was back to wide-eyed shock again. This... was an amazing loft... A small "wow" slipped from her lips. He must be rich. It was that simple. Sara's family was well off, but they worked hard to be that way. Her uncle, whom she lived with, had it slightly easier then her parents, managing bands such, and he had a nice sum saved that she had access to. But this... This was... "Wow..."

She pulled off her jacket, pulling again at the neck of her sweater. She had a tank top under it, and debated taking it off. She hated sweaters... They really weren't her. And if it was just Matrim... Not like he hadn't seen the scar on her chest before. He had given it to her.

Normally, Sara was very shy coming into a new place, but this was Matrim. He could bite her if he had a problem with her making herself at home. She walked over to the nearest chair, laying her jacket on it and looking around again as she pulled her sweater over her head. The tank top covering most of the burn scar, but not all.

"Ya.. I'll have whatever you're going to have, 'kay?" She was still drunk from the drink at the bar, but she figured now that she was at Matrims, it was fine. She would drink more, and he would just have to take care of her. "This is a really nice place... Really... You live alone?"

[Matrim Gallagher]

She seemed amazed by his place. It was kind of expected since he didn't really show off that he was rich. He didn't run around in expensive clothing, and his bike wasn't exactly an expensive piece of equipment. Still, it paid to live this way, "Ya.. I'll have whatever you're going to have, 'kay?"

Matrim walked over to his kitchen area, grabbing two short glasses, a coke, and poured some in both glasses. He then opened a rum bottle that he had stored, but hadn't really opened or drank out of, and poured a good amount into each glass. Walking out of the kitchen and towards Sara he handed her one of the glasses, and drank from his own, "This is a really nice place... Really... You live alone?"

"Yeah, I have ever since I was like fourteen," He explained, "My old man died and left me with sort of a spending limit with his will until I turned eighteen. Which happened last Halloween, since then I've found myself free to do what I want with my inheritance. Not to mention a lot of my family were rock stars, so royalty checks are great..." He looked carefully at her, noticing that she was in a tank top now, her scar was visible. He would get very close to her, his right hand would come up gently to the scar, "It's healing a little.... it looks better....."

His index finger would travel up from the scar to her chin, bringing it up, "I hope it doesn't hurt too badly..." He'd lean in to kiss her gently. He'd set his drink down on the glass table and back away from her slowly breaking away from the kiss. Moving backwards from her he'd turn and make his way up the stairs, slowing down at the staircase to let her know he wanted her to follow him.

[Sara Quinn]

She took the glass he had offered her, bringing it to her lips and taking a small sip, testing how well she could handle the drink. When she realized was fine, and she wasn't going to cough or choke on it, she took a larger drink from the glass, listening to him. She was surprised to hear that he was from a family of rock stars. Huh... Go figure... Shows how you never really knew someone. She felt kind of stupid for not having realizing it sooner. "Ya... I would say they're great, I mean look at this place."

Her gaze swept across the room once more and finally feel to him again. His eyes were on her, and she immediately knew what he was looking at. She tried to act like it didn't matter, that she didn't mind. But she did. She had never been a vain person, but she was starting to realize now, after having it, that she had enjoyed being able to wear the clothes she had been wearing. That she had taken her own skin for granted. She looked up at him as he stepped closer to her.

"It's healing a little.... it looks better.....I hope it doesn't hurt too badly..."

She couldn't bring herself to think of a response to this. Ya, it was healing, but it still hurt like hell. The skin felt tight, and it caught on her clothing. Getting a shower hurt it, sleeping on her stomach hurt it. It was kind of tough getting used to it, and she could only hope it would be completely healed soon. His hand ran up from the scar to lift her chin, giving her a gentle kiss. His slow, precise movements shocked her. So far, this was nothing like the last time. The last time had been rushed, hurried and rough, as though getting it done and over with had been more important then the act itself.

She watched him back away and begin to go upstairs. Everything about him made her think she was supposed to follow. She looked at her drink, and took another few gulps, letting out a breath and set the glass down on the table. And then she followed him. She was shy, embarrassed. She wanted to say something, but didn't know what. So she tried to shut her mind off and just follow him, letting him lead.

[Matrim Gallagher]

He walked over towards his bed, which wasn't too far from the top of the stairs. She followed in his lead and that was good, so he decided to talk on a bit more, "It's strange having a place of my own this nice though. Back in Long Beach I just got this pretty shoddy apartment. Figured I was comfortable with whatever. I don't know though... something changed. I wanted more, I wanted a place to call my own. You know? So.. I bought this place. Had some things done, this decorator chose most of the stuff... but I mean... it's mine. It's my place. This is... this is my home."

He was amazed by it. He had lived in a prison, he had lived in a boarding school, and he had a temporary home in a crappy apartment. Even his fathers house in England which he sold didn't feel as much like home as this place did. And it was his home, he had bought it. He felt accomplished because of that, even though the money wasn't something hard earned of his own. Sure he could play guitar, sure he could play piano, and sure he could sing. But he hadn't done so in awhile, and he never really thought about doing it professionally. Besides, what was he going to do? Cover his old mans songs?

He turned towards Sara, at the foot of his bed, his hands reached to take off her shirt, he paused though before doing so and looked at her, "May I?" He asked, being a gentleman. He wanted to look at the burn mark. He wanted to see what it looked like, all of it and not just part of it. Partially from guilt, but mostly from curiosity of how she looked now that it had healed a little. Of course, the shirt would hopefully just be the beginning. If he could properly observe the scar, and if she didn't stop him, he'd look it over for a few moments before kissing her again. This time a bit more intense, both hands bringing her face up to his.

[Sara Quinn]

She followed him to the top of the stairs, and was again astonished by his home. She stared around, wide eyed in awe. This house was amazing. Not that she would want to live in it. To much work as she saw it. And everything looked like it would get dirty if it wasn't cleaned often enough. And Sara wasn't so good at cleaning. As he finished speaking, her eyes feel to him as she stepped up the bed. He sounded a little surprised with the idea that this was his home. Was he as awed by how epic it was as she was?~

"You've seen my place... It's... not as great as this... But I know what you mean. For the first time, I chose it. My uncle let me choose where we moved, and how I wanted to decorate it. It's the first time I've felt like it was actually mine. And that feels really nice." She was trying to understand him. Maybe being drunk was putting her in the wrong direction, but she was trying. She didn't expect him to respond to her, she was just trying to talk to him. Let him come to understand her, and let him know that she was trying to understand him. He suddenly turned to her, his hands moving to lift her shirt off. Her arms hung loosely at her sides, ready to let him, but he paused.

"May I?"

What...? Well of course he could. Why couldn't he? She blushed, and her hands moved to the bottom of her tank top, and she pulled it up and over her head. She bundled it in her hands, staring downwards. She had done that without thinking. She hoped he didn't think she was to eager or anything... It had been an instinctual reaction... Kind of... She stood in front of him in her bra. She was shy, but it wasn't to bad. The drinks had helped calm her, and she knew it wasn't anything he hadn't seen before. So after a breath, she straightened herself, pulling her hair back over her shoulders, her gaze looking to meet his. But she would find that he was staring at... It had better be the... her... Well this... Why couldn't he just look at her face?! Her hand moved to the print.

And then he was kissing her again. Her shirt fell from her hands and moved to his sides. She tried to take a step closer, her hands moving to his hips, and she squeezed softly before running her hands gently along his sides. They would look for the hem of his shirt, and slip under it, running gently over his chest, her arms pushing it up as her hands moved upwards.

[Matrim Gallagher]

As her hands ran up the insides of his shirt he still continued to kiss her, his hands left her face once her hands ran over her chest, reaching back behind his head and pulling his shirt up from over his head, dropping it down where hers had fallen. After all, one large pile was better then two smaller piles, right? His hands would go down to her waist, as he continued to kiss, pressing harder against her, he unbuttoned her jeans, unzipped, and pulled down on them gently, his hands raising up to the back of her bra, unhooking it, he'd break the kiss long enough to raise the bra up and off of her.

He would now have a full view of the scar with absolutely nothing in the way, his right hand would raise up and hover over it for a second. For some reason he was fascinated with the burn. It was almost poetic to him.

Amazing...

His eyes would return to her own, looking deep into them, his own were a little dull because of the alcohol, otherwise they would be lively in looks. His hands moved down the sides of her body, and he'd go back in to kiss her again, starting it all up over again. He'd eventually lift her up a little, and he'd move onto his bed with his left knee, laying her down gently on the bed. His right knee would then come up onto the bed as he crawled over. Leaning down to keep kissing her, his hand reaching down to unbutton his pants. His kissing would migrate from her own mouth to her neck, and then he'd work his way to nibble a bit on her ear before work back down to the neck once more.

I guess decorating something gives you a sense of connection to it... much like how I've decorated you...

[Sara Quinn]

As he undid her bra, pulling it off of her, she reached down and pushed her jeans down more, pausing only long enough so that he could lift the bra off her arms. Her jeans dropped down and pooled at her feet. And then there was nothing on her. She stood in front of him, only blushing softly. It didn't feel wrong. She had been worried it would, but it actually felt quite right. Although her eyes were clouded from drinking, she was still in control. She felt no shame. Instead, Sara stood proud and tall in front of him. She focused on his hand as it hovered over the burn he had given. She didn't move, didn't speak, just let him do what he needed to.

Her eyes moved from his hand to meet his again. He looked amazed. Now that did make her blush further. She wanted so desperately to know if he was proud of the mark he had left on her. She met him as he came forward, her arms wrapping around his neck, her hand fisting in his hair as he kissed her again. The feeling of his hands on her set her skin on fire, leaving a trail of goosebumps and left her shivering. She went with him willingly when he laid her on the bed. As he leaned over her, she was reminded of the park, and her breathing picked up, sighing out of her as the need built.

As his mouth worked on her neck and ear she built up the courage. She needed to know... Or at least to ask him. To let him know it was on her mind, before this went any further. Her hands moved to his shoulders, pushing up against him to raise his upper body off of her until his arms were straightened and he was supporting himself on them above her. She looked at his face as he leaned over her. She reached for one of his arms, pulling his hand to her mouth. She gently kissed his palm and fingers, and then placed the hand over the burn on her chest, holding it to the skin. "What do you feel...? Are you..." She closed her eyes. "Proud?"

[Matrim Gallagher]

"What do you feel...? Are you... Proud?" She asked him, having kissed his hand before placing it over her scar. He stopped kissing her neck long enough to rest his head against her shoulder, looking at the scar and his hand. He thought about it, and he wasn't sure. On one side it was like she had a reminder of him, something that would always be there, some piece of him that would remind her of that day.

"I feel....." He started to say. He realized that the reason he didn't know what he felt, was because he felt multiple things about this scar, "I feel guilty, for the pain... I feel scared that you somewhat despise me for giving you it... I feel happy that there is some part of me always with you. A reminder of whatever it is thats between us... and in a strange way, a little jealous that you have this but I don't have anything from you. Does that... does that answer your question?"

He thought about it for awhile, going back to her neck a bit, but in between this he would ask her, "What do you feel?" His free hand and feet worked to get his own pants off since they were the last thing left. But he wanted to hear her answer before he did anything. He was curious as to how she felt about the scar.

Do you hate me for it? Do you like the scar? Do you think of me as a horrible person for having positive feelings about the scar itself?

[Sara Quinn]

She listened to him, to everything he said before she let herself think about it. When she finally tried to think about it, she realized she couldn't. She was both happy, and sad, excited and angry. She both loved and hated his answer. Her mind, in the confusion, was now drawing a blank. Her eyes remained closed, simply feeling his hand on her. She... liked it. The weight of it, the feel of it. It was like the only puzzle piece that would fit. And now with Travis... essentially gone... It was nice to feel whole again.

"Ya... That answers it..." She could only bring herself to whisper it to him. She couldn't seem to find her voice. She knew if she could, that it would be shaking and cracked. She appreciated his honesty. It meant a lot to her. More then he could know. But what did she feel? It was a difficult question and she realized how on the spot she had put him. And the least she could do was answer him as honestly as she could. He was working off his pants though, and her mind was beginning to cloud.

"I... It hurt. A lot. The burn, I mean. And with Travis... That hurt to. I was hurt that you would injure me like that, permanently scar me... But, I'm also... happy..." She paused for a moment, taking a breath, blushing. "I feel... good almost... when I see it. Knowing it's yours... It connects me to you. Forever..."

She held her breath now, waiting to see what he said, or did. The forever thing might have been a little over the top. But it was true. It was a connection, she felt owned. And it felt nice, because it gave her a feeling of security. She trusted Matrim. If anyone would do a good job of taking care of he, she felt he would be one of the best. She wanted to cry though, like she had spilled her darkest secret for the world to see. And thinking about Travis had hurt. She didn't want to think about him. At all...

[Matrim Gallagher]

"I... It hurt. A lot. The burn, I mean. And with Travis... That hurt to. I was hurt that you would injure me like that, permanently scar me... But, I'm also... happy... I feel... good almost... when I see it. Knowing it's yours... It connects me to you. Forever..."

She said the words Matrim was too afraid to say. Or rather, the word. Forever.

Matrim pushed himself up so that his face was directly in front of hers, he kissed her on the lips, a small gentle kiss, "You're absolutely right..." He said, smiling at her, prolonging the inevitable just a bit more so he could say what he wanted to say, "Forever...." He said, a smile creeping over his face. His eyes showing that he had agreed with her about it all. He leaned forward and kissed her more passionately and aggressively then he had all day.

*Toime Skip*

Matrim would be laying on the bed. It was still night time, and he was tired, but he wasn't going to fall asleep. He had a buzz going, and besides. For some reason he thought he'd stay up and talk to Sara. He leaned his head back against his pillow, looking over at her and smiling, chuckling a little bit. He shut his eyes and took a deep breath, "So...."

[Sara Quinn]

When he pushed himself up, Sara actually flinched, afraid he was going to yell at her. Or worse... Tell her she was wrong... Or stupid... Clingy. That would have hurt her more then any slap or burn could have. But instead, she felt him gently kiss her lips, speaking to her. Telling her he agreed. She opened her eyes to see him smiling at her. A smile touched her lips as well, and her arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him to her.

*Time Skip*

She lay on her stomach, clutching a pillow under her head. Her eyes were closed. She felt like a log. She felt so tired and good. Like she could sleep for a year. Her mind was a complete blank and she loved it.

"So...."

She opened her eyes slowly, smiling at him and rolled onto her side, stretching. "So... Got anything else to drink...?" She laughed softly pulling the sheet up further. As she moved, the skin on her chest tightened and she paused only briefly. The scar made her feel ugly. Marred. It was healing nicely, and she might even be able to wear tank tops again soon, but right now... Naked in front of Matrim, she felt very aware of it. "Don't... You think it's ugly...?" She didn't know what sort of answer to expect, or even if she should expect one, but she wanted to ask. To see how he would answer. A test of sorts. There was no right or wrong answer. Only the truth.

[Matrim Gallagher]

Matrim slid off to the foot of the bed to put his pants on since she asked if he had anything else to drink, to which he replied, "Yeah, just name it. Alcohol, not alcohol, whatever you want really. Except I don't have orange juice," He explained, since he didn't really drink orange juice or make any mixed drinks from it. And the thing about living alone was, you only had what you ate. Otherwise you were just being wasteful.

"Don't... You think it's ugly...?" She asked, he turned and looked at her. A smile on his face, he didn't think she was ugly at all, and the scar didn't change that fact. Sure scars weren't exactly what was in. But to Matrim, she was beautiful. The hand print and all.

"I'll have you know that's my hand your talking about. I like to think I have very handsome hands, that happen to look just smashing on you," He said giving her a wink before heading downstairs to his kitchen. He wanted something to drink himself, he just wasn't sure what. He had drank enough alcohol for one night, and he needed something a bit more hydrating. So he grabbed a water bottle from his fridge and downed it quickly, waiting to hear from her what she wanted. "You don't think it's ugly do you? I mean it may be new but give it a chance and I'm sure it'll grow on you."

[Sara Quinn]

Sara went to laying back on her stomach, watching him, as he got up to get the drinks, putting on his pants at the bottom of the bed. She didn't really care what it was, but she was dying of thirst. As much fun as alcohol sounded, she thought some water might do her some good.

She wondered if he was going to answer her. Finally, he turned, a smile on his face. She couldn't bring herself to smile back, but she felt her face redden. She was kind of wishing she hadn't asked the question, and had instead stayed quiet about it. She really didn't know what to expect for his answer, and it bothered her. She hated being caught off guard, and no matter what he said, she was probably going to be caught off guard.

But he surprised her. First sentence out of his mouth had a smile touching her lips. She should have known he wasn't going to make her feel like a fool for asking. She blushed deeper, burying her head into the pillow as she let out a soft laugh, stretching her back as she listened to him.

She felt the bed move as he got up to go to the kitchen. She shifted, watching him out of the corner of her eye as he left. When he was out of sight she pushed herself into a sitting position, sheet wrapped around her body, hugging her knees to her chest. Her forehead dropped to rest on her knees and she sighed. What the hell was she doing...? She was confused. She didn't know what was going on inside her. She felt... both happy and sad at the moment. As though the moment he had left the room, her brain had allowed itself to return to normal, letting the doubts, fears, and regrets come to the front of her mind.

She didn't know what to think... She was lonely now without Travis. She felt lost, and alone... She missed Travis, she had loved him. He had been important to her. Before Travis had come, she had been so depressed. Lonely, and bored, she had acted out. She still acted out, even after meeting him, but at least she had been happy. And although she tried not to blame it on Matrim, she did feel that he owed her some comfort, some attention that she now didn't have. At the same time... She craved that attention from him. She wanted him to care for her... Because... She cared for him.

Sara heard him call to her from the kitchen. Her head lifted as she thought about an answer. Then she realized she probably shouldn't yell it to him. It was going to be one of those answers, and it would probably be best to be closer to him when she answered so he didn't hear her wrong and she would have to repeat it... She got out of his bed, pulling on her panties, and then her tank top as she set off down the stairs.

She hit the bottom of the stairs and smiled at him. A real smile. She couldn't help but smile when she saw him. Then she dropped her gaze, looking anywhere but at him, trying to appear as though she was just checking his place out, and walked over to him. "You know... It's really weird... I don't think it's ugy. I feel kinda... happy when I see it..." And it wasn't a lie... There was just so much more to it then that. "Gimme a water." She held out her hand, blushing furiously.

[Matrim Gallagher]

She walked down the stairs, and he couldn't help but notice how good she looked. He noticed it more often now, what she was wearing and how it looked on her. He always noticed it before, but it was always in the back of his head somewhere, hidden away because he felt guilty about having those feelings. Or worse, he didn't feel guilt, and then he felt guilty since he didn't feel guilt. It was an endless guilt cycle, though he supposed that was probably over now. He and Reira were over, it was sad, and she used to be all he knew. He felt so bad for her, but at the same time he knew he had to move on eventually. He couldn't let himself dwell on this.

Finally she spoke, giving her own answer, "You know... It's really weird... I don't think it's ugy. I feel kinda... happy when I see it...Gimme a water." She said. And he smiled at her answer, he opened up his fridge, grabbing another water bottle.

"That's good," He'd say, staring into the fridge. He realized he was out of a few things, and he was making a mental note of what he needed to get at the grocery, "I feel the same way."

He turned as he shut the door, leaning the bottle towards her. He'd suddenly raise it high above her head as soon as she made any attempt to grab it. He'd smile and look at her expecting something, "Whats the magic word?" He asked, joking around with her. She seemed to be getting a little serious, they both have been getting that way. He wanted to keep them from becoming too melodramatic, so he thought he'd lighten the mood and be a little silly, a smug grin appearing on his face as he looked at her, her outfit made it hard to look away from her.